On the Run
by Whitefire Warrior
Summary: Zuko and Iroh have escaped from the Fire Nation! Each has their own problems, and Aang is going to the capital to battle Ozai. What happens when they meet a rebel Firebender and an EK warrior? AU Book 3, no shipping. Rated T for violence. PERMANENT HIATUS
1. Prologue, Questions

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the show Avatar: The Last Airbender. If I did, then Season 3, the live-action movie, and the Avatar continuation would have all come faster. Said show is property of Nickelodeon, a division of Viacom.

I created this story as something to occupy my imagination, but I need feedback on what I have up so far. So, please review! All of your comments are highly appreciated -- I even accept flames.

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**Prologue**

Princess Azula's ship cruised off into the horizon. Little did the casual observer know that the elaborate craft held three extra Firebenders upon its departure from the Earth Kingdom.

The newest female aboard punched listlessly at the reinforced wall of her tiny jail cell. Squeezing her eyes shut, she slumped in a dejected heap in the corner. The metal used here was too strong to break through with any one fireblast, and following up the first hit would be both impractical and impossible. At least five guards had been posted outside of her cell, and anything she did would get her relocated to an even more confined area. _If such a thing is even possible._ The cramped space was, in actuality, a spare storage-room, eight paces long by five paces wide. It had recently been converted into her makeshift prison.

The fifteen-year-old's dark-haired head dropped to the knees as she curled up, her back to one of the indiscernible metal barricades, pondering her fate. Where had she messed up? Why had this happened? And what was in store for her when the ship reached the Fire Nation?

**Chapter 1: Questions**

_I've become so numb, I can't feel you there,_

_I've become so tired, so much more aware,_

_I'm becoming this, all I wanted to do,_

_Is be more like me, and be less like you_

_"Numb," Linkin' Park_

Zuko was empty.

Not in the depressed way, not in the sleep-deprived way, and most certainly not in the needy way. After all, he _had_ regained his princely status.

But right now, he was just…empty. So empty that he did not even know it, that he could not put a name to his state of soullessness. Why did he feel this way?

Death would be a better option. The experience of being burned, scarred for life (literally!), disowned, and banished by his father had been far happier. So, to a normal, logical being, it would seem obvious which choice he should have taken.

Too bad for Zuko that he was too numb to hear his own voices.

His uncle's ashamed gaze – his _uncle_, trapped first in the catacombs and then in the cells – caught him right in the eyes every time he blinked. The image persisted, staring back at him through eyelids that knew no rest. He just stood there on the deck, dark gold orbs glazed over and turned forlornly towards the endless sea, the face a set mask of indifference and large hands curled so tightly around the railing that his knuckles bruised pale.

Azula, the Fire Princess and his sister, strolled up to stand beside him at the edge of deck. That mellifluous voice snapped him back to reality as she faced him. _Rather impatiently_, his subconscious noted.

"Something troubles you, Prince Zuko?"

It was really more a statement than a question. Of course something _troubled_ him, to put it _mildly_, the little voice in his head rebutted. But he couldn't tell his younger sister straight out. She would suspect him of treachery and have him kept under guard day and night until they reached the Fire Nation, no doubt. Zuko hadn't even _wanted_ to leave Ba Sing Se and the Earth Kingdom, fearing the extra insanity that awaited him back home. And Agni knew he'd already had more than his share of the craziness.

The Crown Prince temporarily appeared to be at a loss for words. He lifted his head, turning a confused golden gaze into the distance. Even now, the day after he had betrayed his uncle, his only hope during exile, he could not feel the beast and the man that clashed within his mind.

After a long, empty silence that proceeded Azula's question, he spoke the words that had plagued him for the past night, the words that had left him restless yet run-down, sleepless yet simply desiring peace and certainty of mind.

The words that might turn him into a madman.

"Who am I?"

His uncle, the retire Dragon of the West and Zuko's even-keeled mentor for three years, had asked that same question of him before, as they stood in the cell of the Avatar's imprisoned bison, back in the Earth Kingdom. Now, they were all that Zuko had left of his sanity.

It was just as his uncle had stated to the Prince as they stood before the Earth King's palace. Destiny truly was a funny thing.

"Excuse me?"

Once again, that annoyingly sweet, serpentine voice cut into his detached thoughts. Azula's golden-brown gaze was drilling a blue-edged cavity just above the colossal burn mark that marred the left side of his regal face, causing that little voice infinite pain and annoyance.

He glanced towards his sister. Something was off about her: something that made her seem even more snakelike than before. Then he recognized the evil intent in those eyes. The blue dragon from his dream! Her words echoing hollowly in his head: "Sleep…just like MOTHER!"

Realizing that the Royal Prodigy was still there, Zuko amended his previous statement. "Will Father really accept me when I return?" But as soon as the words were out of his mouth, he felt regret. However, this came with an ironic sense of pleasure; at least he could feel something.

Azula simply smiled at him.

- - - - - - -

Meanwhile, the subject of Zuko's numbed thoughts was sitting quietly in his cell, legs crossed in the lotus position. General Iroh had approximately eight million questions clamoring in his mind, none of which linked to an immediate answer.

The voices were driving him nuts!

How could his nephew – _his nephew_ – have done this? And just when things were looking up, too! Iroh's shame, anger, disappointment, weariness, and general frustration milled into one large wave of brain static. Thankfully, he just allowed it to swirl in his head, preferring the wordless frenzy to the empty silence shrouding his body in an unresponsive barrier.

His nephew, Zuko, whom he had guided and mentored for so long, had betrayed him. Why had he not noticed the signs of betrayal? Why had Zuko trusted his Azula? She was bad news for everyone around her.

That boy was truly a mystery, but then again, so was his younger sister.

And had Azula actually wanted Zuko back as her elder brother, and not just another marionette for her twisted entertainment? She had burned quite a few of the dolls that Iroh had sent her when she was a child. Now, he just figured that she hadn't liked them because they were merely stuffed figurines and not real people that she could manipulate.

But why hadn't she just killed both Iroh and Zuko on the spot, instead of taking them back to Sozun? Wouldn't that save her the trouble? Or, more likely, she had an ulterior motive as usual. But who would put the idea in her head – Ozai? And why?

Why?


	2. Discoveries

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender. I _do_, however, own Kangdi, whose name shall later be changed as you continue reading and finding out more about her backstory. Avatar and all related references are owned by Nickelodeon.

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**Chapter 2: Discoveries**

_Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me_

_Distracting/reacting_

_Against my will I stand beside my own reflection_

_It's haunting/how I can't seem_

_To find myself again_

_My walls are closing in_

_(Without a sense of confidence and I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)_

_I've felt this way before_

_So insecure_

_"Crawling," Linkin' Park_

"Is he coming around yet?"

"Wait, Sokka." A brown-haired young girl dressed in blue robes glanced up from where she was tending to her friend the Avatar, to snap at her brother. "Don't be so impatient."

The dark-skinned Water Tribes warrior crossed two partially bandaged arms over his chest. "Hey, all I'm saying is that Aang should wake up as soon as he can. We're gonna need him conscious if we want to invade the Fire Nation next."

His battle plan was at least rational. But the numbskulled dolt was getting on the two girls' nerves. And despite possessing his famed "Sokka's instincts," the warrior couldn't sense the impending danger.

Therefore, the fifteen-year-old was not expecting what came next. The ground that he had been standing on shot up into a long, thin column, catapulting the boomerang wielder straight up into the air. Toph Bei Fong stood in the filtering sunlight, her heel embedded solidly into the ground as Sokka shot away.

Katara looked around the find the source of the earthbending. She blinked innocently at her blind friend. "Hey, it's quiet!"

The silence was only temporary. There came a loud, insistent "Ahhhhh!" as Sokka crashed back down, and the twelve-year-old Earthbending Master who was the cause of his pain shrugged. "Or not."

"WHY DO YOU KEEP DOING THAT?!?"

"Because you can't keep your mouth shut, Snoozles."

Sokka grumbled at this. He could see no flaw in Toph's logic; and the dissatisfied boomerang wielder chose to limp away, nursing his sore backside.

Toph sat down beside the older Waterbender. "He has a point, Sugarqueen." Her clouded green eyes completely missed the startled look that Katara's blue ones sent her. "The eclipse is coming soon, and there's lots that we gotta do. Aang would want us to start doing whatever we can right now. First off, we need to find him a Firebending master. Then we'll need a plan to get into the Fire Nation, and disguises for everyone. I doubt the Firebender guards will welcome the Avatar, two people from the Water Tribe, and one from the Earth Kingdom, much less help us get in. And once we've done all that, there's still the problem of the extra royalty getting in our way."

Katara nodded her acceptance of her friend's analysis. "That all sounds pretty good, but what should we do?"

Toph grinned. "We may still have another trump card. Katara, I need you to tell me all about everything that happened down in the catacombs. Don't leave out any details: they could be really important. Now, spill."

* * *

The voices wouldn't stop. 

For the past day, the clueless prince had been lying in his room trying to sort out the mess of rebellious thoughts in his head. They wouldn't quiet down.

_Shut up!_ he yelled at them.

_No! _

_Why not?_

_You betrayed Uncle Iroh, and you know it. He never had to join you when you were in exile. Is this your thanks – turning the Dragon of the West into a fugitive and then turning him in to Ozai?_

_I never asked him to join me._

_Do you have any idea of how much you mean to him? Well? Do you?_

_Does it sound like I care? About anything? At all? _

_Admit it,_ Zuzu_. You're too afraid. You're too weak. You knew that you could help him, you knew you had a chance, and you knew that no matter what you do, your perfect family was never coming back. And it never will._

_My father loves me!_ he argued silently. _I've helped Azula conquer Ba Sing Se. I've helped Azula kill the Avatar. I will get my honor back. Father will welcome me home with honor!_ One hand absently reached up to trace the scar over his left eye as the boy battled his simmering conscience.

_Oh, yes, _honor_ is something that you seem to know all about, eh, Prince Zuko? "If your father really wanted you home, he would have let you return by now, Avatar or not. But in his eyes, you are a failure and a disgrace to the Fire Nation." That's what Zhao said, isn't it? Guess what. He was right! No matter what you do…_

_SHUT UP!_

…_no matter how hard you try, your father will never truly accept you back. He always did adore Azula. And she always has lied, just like she's lying now about what happened. When you get back, she could persuade Father to have you executed. She could use you to get something that she's always wanted. _

_SHUT UP!_

_No. Either way, Zuzu, you've lost. You never had even a scrap of dear Daddy's attention. And now? Now, you've gone running back to Daddy and betrayed Uncle Iroh. You turned your back on him, imprisoned him, led Azula straight to him. You let her manipulate you!_

_You don't know what you're talking about or who you're talking to, so SHUT UP!_

_Don't I, really? After all, I am a part of you. Let me tell you what I'm talking about. I'm talking about how you tossed away the only person left who trusted, loved, and respected you, all for a foolish whim that will never come true. I'm talking about how you do not deserve the throne, or the title of Fire Prince: only your uncle does. I'm talking about how you proved you were really a traitor all along. Zuko, you weakling._

_SHUT UP!_

_Weakling…weakling…weakling…_

* * *

Kangdi was trying to find a way out. _Think, think, come on, there's got to be some use for that brain._ Dark amber orbs roved around the cell, finally resting on the door. The hinges! Of course! She knew from experience that they were the pressure points of any door; if her captors had been such dolts as to situate them on the inside, then a bit of applied tinkering should loosen the mechanisms. A sly grin spread over her face. 

No such luck, though. The firebender's enthusiasm was promptly squashed as she examined the panel. It was a sliding door – no surprises there.

Punching a hole in the opposite wall would not be the best idea, either. If she did that, Kangdi would simply plunge into the ocean, to be gifted to sea serpents and the like, or pounded into the rocky coastline of the Fire Nation, extinguished like so many miniature flames. No doubt Princess Azula would be highly entertained by both endings. Neither prospect seemed very heartening to its victim, but the warrior's second plan was also crushed, as the walls turned out to be even more heavily reinforced than the door itself.

She pounded the side of her jail cell in exasperated anger. No! There had to be some way, some technique in existence that would let her break out. Or maybe… She grinned, recalling her Firebending basics. Maybe that technique didn't have to exist yet.

"Here, hold your hands like this. Direct the qi into your arm, and keep it there. Build up your force as you move, so."

The man assumed a back stance in the gray pre-dawn hours, extending his left arm out in front of him and building up power in his right. Core energy began to leak out of his hands, assuming the form of fire. Then, he sent a swift punch to the air in forn of himself. Fire exploded out of his tightly clenched fist, spreading out in every direction. "Release!"

He turned to the small figure standing beside him, who was watching in amazement. "Building up power is crucial to this technique. You must also channel the energy properly and direct your fire. Try it."

"Sure thing, Dad!" The excited younger firebender had assumed the same position long before. Ripping energy from her core and sending it to her fist, she dealt a similar blow to the air. "Ha!"

Fire exploded out of her fist in a similar fashion. But only similar. Although the girl had done exactly as she had been instructed, the technique was a bit off-kilter and decidedly smaller than what her father had modeled. But instead of helping out, the amber-eyed man just shook his head and walked away.

For the young girl, that entire day was passed practicing and refining the technique nonstop. Perhaps she was a Firebender, but she had still picked up a stubborn grit from the Earthbender fugitives that passed through.

When she was quite finished, she had missed all three meals, shirked her duties for the day, and thoroughly warmed and scorched the entire practice ground, as well as her hands, in achieving thorough mastery of the technique. This had taken a goodly toll on her eight-year-old body, and the young girl was charred and covered in dirt and scratches, none of which she seemed to mind. Finally satisfied, she toppled with exhaustion…

A secretive smile stole over Kangdi's face at the recollection.

If she could just spread the core energy through the metal door as her fist hit it, the resulting explosion might tear it off its joints. Otherwise, she could concentrate the energy around her fist and make that explode on contact, greatly multiplying the strength behind the blow.

Firebenders had the ability to extend invisible qi lines beyond the body without having their energy immediately turned into their element. While the fifteen-year-old had witnessed this before, it had only been for show, executed by uncivilized thugs in the Fire Nation streets. The trick was fairly simple once you had a good grip on the basics. Combined with one hard shot, it might be turned into a fearsome weapon.

Now the rebel grinned outright.

This was her chance!


	3. Confrontations

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Avatar, it is the property of Nickelodeon and whoever created it. I do own Kangdi and all references to her, however.

**Author's Note:** Kangdi's name means "Resist the enemy" in Chinese. I found it fitting for her character, especially in this chapter, and I had a lot of fun writing the fight scene. However, this fiction is rated T for the language, though it be in Japanese, and some violence.

On with the story!

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**Chapter 3: Confrontations**

_Fear in me, so deep it gets the best of me_

_In the fear I fall, here it comes, face-to-face with me_

_Here I stand, hold back so no one can see,_

_I feel these wounds, step down, step down, step down_

_"Downfall," Trust Company_

The Avatar's companions were packing up and loading their things onto Appa, wanting Earth King Kuei and his pet Bosco: the hopeless duo had decided to "travel the world" in humble disguises, and apparently, they were doing just that. On a more serious note, Aang, Katara, Sokka, and Toph were expecting a lot that day: being attacked by huge mythical monsters, getting rocks thrown at them by a bunch of Dai Li, etc, etc. However, they weren't expecting the small fleet of Fire Navy warships that cruised right toward their island, without firing a single shot. The three benders and the lone warrior readied their battle stances.

Nor were they expecting the huge surprise when the prow lowered to form a metal gangway, allowing a grinning Hakoda to step out with arms stretched towards his children.

"What, has it been so long since I last saw you two?"

"DAD!"

* * *

The flaming punch that drove into the cell door was followed by a rather loud splintering crash as the impure metal melted, cracked, and then shattered outwards. The noise attracted guards from all over the ship, and Fire Nation soldiers sprinted to the source of the cacophony. Agni forbid that one of the prisoners had escaped! 

But by the time that they had arrived on scene, the teenage Firebender was already weaving through the shadows along the far side of the corridors.

Too bad she was wearing Earth Kingdom greens and browns.

Against the blur of reddened metal hinges, bolts, nuts, plating, and parts, ­­­­the rebel might as well have ridden a stampeding sky bison down the hall for all the subtlety her outfit brought her. _So much for a stealthy escape. Bleeding hog-monkeys, this place is a maze!_ As she ran, frenziedly deflecting spears and fireblasts, she cursed out her terrible situation as thoroughly as knowledge allowed, switching from the Fire Nation scope to the language of the rebellion to plain Middle-speak.

"Oh kuso, chikshau, wan-dan-le. This is _not_ good!" She didn't even bother to quip about what a huge understatement that was.

And as the soldiers piled on her, Kangdi found herself stuck like a gnat on the proverbial flypaper.

"AZULA I WILL GET YOU FOR THIS!"

Where was that overpainted disgrace, anyway?

* * *

The Princess in question had been standing calmly in the throne-room of her ornate ship, engaging her elder brother in one-sided conversation on current Fire Nation politics, when the relatively loud jailbreak reached royal ears in the form of a huge explosion and a bout of undignified yells, mostly caused by a female voice screaming bloody murder through a muffled string of rainbow-hued oaths. 

For their part, the Fire Nation Prince and Princess just stood there, shocked and confused, as the ruckus subsided, and Azula promptly regained control of the situation. Swiveling, she regally paced the short distance to her palanquin. Golden-brown eyes glinted certain ruthlessness as she glared at the door, seemingly intending to bore a hole in the tempered metal with the ferocity embedded in that one look. The Princess was clearly upset with her most recent interruption. Her irritable voice snapped, "Enter!" at the hinged door panel.

The entryway opened, and several guards entered, dragging a young girl by the shoulders. She looked to be not much older than Azula, her eyes and skin a shade or two darker from training outdoors, and she was dressed in an Earth Kingdom outfit that bore a striking resemblance to the Fire Princess'. And it appeared that she was doing quite a thorough job of digging her heels in.

The sight of the other fifteen-year-old, hands clamped firmly behind her by thick rope bonds and her back somewhat bowed by the weight of the guards that pressed her forward, seemed to cheer up the Princess. One side of the painted cherry-red lips twisted up dangerously, and her voice laced with honey, the royal mocked, "Hello, ­­Kangdi."

Kangdi smirked grimly. "Nice to see you again, too, _Azula-gong-zhu_." From where she was latched onto by several scared-looking royal guards, it was so much easier for the rebel to turn Azula's royal title into a royal condemnation. "Going to offer me that position again?"

Zuko looked from his sister to the prisoner again. Position? What was she talking about? Was there something going on here that he didn't know about? Then again, that wouldn't be very surprising, considering that he had spent his last three years in exile. But as his eyes settled on the other female Firebender, a little voice tickled at the back of the subconscious, an insistent niggling on how his uncle would have been so pleased to see him defying Azula and Ozai like that. All in vain, though. The message never even registered in the clueless boy's mind.

The left corner of Azula's lipsticked mouth twisted up further than humanly possible. "Oh? Have you reconsidered joining me?" Slightly insane orbs took on a curious glint, almost like those of a fox-hawk toying with a small rodent – or rather, a cobra wondering if ­­­­­Kangdi was good enough to eat.

Kangdi turned a similarly devious look on her adversary, a mongoose-lizard eyeing the cobra to determine where it would prefer to strike the vile serpent first. "Nah, I just wanted to visit you. I heard that you conquered Ba Sing Se. Did you kill them all, huh? What's Daddy gonna do?"

Azula was quickly tiring of both her polite façade and her opponent. Electricity sparked to life between her index and middle fingers as she strode forward, and guards scrambled in fear. Over the crackle and snap of lightning, the Fire Princess' voice sounded. "Dai Li, release her." The green-robed ones remaining followed suit. To Kangdi: "You are not royalty and you have no status, _peasant_; you also have no right to speak that way. Now, be grateful for your quick and painless death."

Dry scraping was audible throughout the baroque hall as the doomed rebel stared. _So this is the cold fire._ Entranced by the sparkling glitter, ­­­Kangdi's eyes widened, and she leaned in just a bit to get a better look at the technique. But her reverie was broken as a Dai Li turned and roughly towed her back upright.

Azula's fingers wove tightly controlled arcs through the air, cruelty inked in her pupils.

Zuko just watched in horror. Although he had never known the prisoner, this was the second time that the Crown Prince would be witness to his younger sister murdering another person – and his first up close. And his mental turbulence rendered the seventeen-year-old utterly powerless to do anything about it, no matter how hard his conscience rebelled.

The young Prince had learned his lesson quite absolutely in his father's war chamber, and he was not quite ready to be scarred – literally! – by his family again. But helping his sister to kill someone else would certainly not earn him any good karma, and Zuko was not sure if he was ready to deal with an extra heaping of conscience on top of what he already had.

_Stop!_

Azula lunged.

But the Fire Prince would be deprived of his precious moment. As the lightning began to snap from Azula's fingers, ­Kangdi threw herself to the side, evading death by electrocution. Behind her back, bound hands glowed an intense red, and the other female tossed off her rope trusses. She was free!

No time to gloat, however, as she skipped away, bending over backwards to avoid the gout of azure blazes that whipped overhead with a cry of alarm. The fireblast blew a hole in the partition, scattering steel debris. As soon as it had passed, Kangdi flexed back up, sending one thick whip streaming down the room. Her red flames roared harmlessly into the side wall as Azula dodged. But Kangdi was already off, charging directly for her goal when a guard stepped into her path, leveling his spear at her and stubbornly refusing to move.

_Fine! I'll get rid of you first!_

Snatching up several chunks of metal shrapnel, the warrior rebel hurled them at that annoying roadblock. As the guard dodged to his left, she had changed direction and slid behind him; reducing the spear shaft to ashes with a well-placed fireblast, she lifted her right leg and brought it crashing straight across his torso. "Hra!" Easily, the larger soldier caught her kick, as she twisted her body, sending a successive punch and then her other boot towards his faceplate. He blocked both of those expertly, too.

Now airborne and almost upside-down, ­­Kangdi smirked as she withdrew the first boot and rammed a partially qi-laden right fist into the unfortunate soldier's armored body. The energy released in a miniature explosion, driving right through the blood-red plating.

Although the technique was not nearly as strong as when she had first experimented on her cell door, it was sufficient to send the troublesome guard skidding several yards backwards.

It also elicited a round of puzzled and disbelieving looks from the sidelined soldiers. They might have stepped forward to help had not Azula already ordered them to stand down, and as it was, they were far too terrified to incur Her blue wrath. Yet one of their best hand-to-hand combat guards had just been punched – punched! – a quarter of the way across the throne-room! What was going on here? What was that technique?

Kangdi took advantage of the diversion to time to complete a half-somersault, landing in a crouch to avoid splattering on the ground.

Quickly, she was forced to block another wave of blue heat. While the rebel successfully dispersed the attack, the explosive power inside sent her reeling several feet backwards. Kangdi wasn't one to give up that easily, though. Clenching her hands into fists, she began punching off successive fireblasts at her opponent, the plasmid substance issuing from the knuckles of her second and third fingers. Shots volleyed back and forth between the two girls for a good half minute before Azula effortlessly laid down a scorching blue fire whip.

Wheeling away from the blazing chain, Kangdi ripped the energy from her core. She directed it into her fists as she closed the spatial gap between the two contestants: within a mere six seconds, she was within three arm's lengths of the Fire Princess; leaping, the rebel sent a pile-driving punch at her opponent as she released the energy trapped within her fist.

Azula found the blow coming uncomfortably close. She leapt from the raised stage, narrowly avoiding the hit. As luck would have it, Kangdi's gloved fist smashed into the metal wall – but with a huge amount of firepower behind it. The attack discharged, and core energy exploded out of the rebel's hand rather forcibly, creating a sizeable dent in the metal wall that expanded and crumpled under the immense strength and heat behind the punch, thermal expansion cracking the material. Kangdi's natural inventiveness truly had served her well.

As for Zuko and everyone else in the room, they just stared at the section of ruined steel paneling, hardly believing their eyes.

Not Azula, though. She took a flying leap, turned two airborne somersaults, and with that double flip kick, launched a bolt of cerulean flames at the other Firebender.

"…get out of my WAY!" This was directed more at the incoming blue conflagration than anything else, as Kangdi landed a killer left hook to the inferno. Deflected, the compact missile zoomed towards the soldiers. However, this particular militia had been chosen for status and not courage; therefore, an undignified scramble proved necessary as the fire slammed into the metal wall.

Now so near to Azula, the rebel closed for the kill. She went at the Princess with everything she had, fists blazing a golden-orange. An unexpected kick broke the series of punches as Kangdi swung her left leg upwards and brought it down at Azula, fire spouting from her heel. Too bad her opponent had already jumped, and was coming down hard. Dark amber orbs narrowed just a bit as the rebel focused on Azula's movements.

_Shanarou!_

She rolled out of the way, narrowly avoiding the cerulean flames that charred metal where she had stood just an instant ago. But not fast enough. A lick of flame swept across her bared upper arm, singeing one short sleeve of the Earth Kingdom uniform and leaving a long, angry red weal across a pressure point. Locking her jaw against the pain, Kangdi leapt up and slashed out at Azula, only to have her good arm grabbed and levered to bodily smash her into the nearest barrier.

The young rebel's shoulder dislocated from the momentum, her burned right arm colliding with the railing, as she realized that Azula's hands had been superheated. Tongues of searing hurt licked up her upper left arm, and she cried out not from the pain but from the shock of being defeated by such a basic move.

"Ow!"

This was one of the times that the rebel was grateful for her high pain threshold.

It wouldn't help much. Seeing her down, the guards tentatively rushed up and grabbed her by the arms, furthering the flaming discomfort already there.

Azula stood up, undeterred. But behind that mask of indifference, Kangdi could see that the Princess was a bit shaken – whether from surprise or exertion – and she allowed herself a concealed smirk. Although the rebel had given it her all and lost, getting some results was victory in itself.

Ignoring the aggravated burns on her arms, Kangdi tilted her head to one side curiously as she was dragged out the door, not bothering to hide the smug grin anymore. "Wow, Azula. Looks like you actually _need_ your guards."

The metal barrier slammed in her face.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Read and review please! I want to hear from you about what you liked, what you thought should be improved, how was my character development, did I do enough research or description. Especially if Kangdi is turning out to be a Mary-Sue: tell me immediately! Anonymous reviews ARE enabled, so you don't need an account to drop a comment. I even accept flames. 

C'mon, guys, I know you're out there and I could use some INSPIRATION for the next chapter! I will try to update once a week, at best.


	4. Stranger

**Disclaimer:** _Avatar_ and all references to it are the property of Nickelodeon, a subsidiary of Viacom. I do not own _Avatar_, although I wish I did. I do own the idea of Kangdi and the role she plays in this story.

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Chapter 4: Stranger**

_Acting is just a skill _

_And so is putting up barriers. _

_What's a true virtue is knowing who we really are, _

_Through the eyes of strangers. _

_-- Anonymous_

He had been fooling the guard, all right. Iroh grinned as he slicked back a couple of rebellious strands from his forehead, and hung there by the bars of his cage, munching contentedly on his bread-ball and pondering the latest gossip. The prison grapevine was not something to be laughed at, especially when the 'prison' referred to his brother's Royal Dungeons. Royal? Huh. Honestly, the common Earth Kingdom cells were more comfortable than this. His metal cage was cold, damp, and claustrophobic: if these conditions were called royal, then the Dragon of the West had only a guess as to how the peasant 'guests' lived.

"Huh!"

A grunt of effort, released as he curled up and hooked his feet around the cage bars, the mound of steamed dough gone, and his body began churning out inverted sit-ups. Soon, his time would come. Soon enough…

_Clang_.

The mournful sound of yet another prisoner being brought in, the clinking of the metal fetter amplified by cold steel walls, reached his ears. The guards were coming! He dropped lightly down from the top of his cage and scrabbled over to the door, for although he could not see the visitor from the small window installed in the cell door. Sounds of the prison warden rang down the narrow corridor.

After a forcible dragging out of the royal conference room, Kangdi had been confronted by one of the Princess' lackeys, the pink idiot. Tie Me, had it been? Tie…Ty… Ty Lee. Yes, that was it! The bubbly acrobat had proceeded to hit several nerves in Kangdi's body, rendering the Firebender's abilities useless, and then stopped all movement with a sharp jab to her left shoulder. Subsequently, the rebel had been hauled to some 'royal dungeon' place, and left with an extremely annoying man with a pinched, arrogant look about his face who carried a rip-off of the traditional spear. He jabbered on and on about himself, his rules, and his patriotism as he led her to her jail cell. But as far as Kangdi could tell, the dolt was a prick with an over-inflated ego and a big mouth.

* * *

"That's where you're headed, traitor. And as a warning, never, ever try to oppose anyone of our royal family again. Got it? Or me. Because I'm a part of the great Fire Nation, unlike you." 

_You're annoying._

"Don't try to pull any tricks, or I'll see that you receive a fitting punishment! You may think you can beat me, but you can't! Look at you. You could have made a fine soldier in the army, enjoyed the good life, but no, you had to betray your nation! Traitor! You're not even worth –"

"Yeah, yeah, I got it. Now SHUT UP!"

She was tired of the idiot's voice bombarding her sensitive ears, tired of watching his jaw go up and down like that of a fish in the rain. Frankly, Kangdi had much better things to be doing with her time, even if she was a prisoner.

A stumble as she was roughly ushered through an open door and into a small, barred room. The guard unshackled the disabled Firebender, grabbing Kangdi's shoulder and shoving the girl into the cell.

"Itai! Watch it, fool!"

Her polite request was ignored as the guard slammed and locked the doors, then strode out in an apparently excellent mood. He was sniggering.

* * *

Iroh waited a while. 

And waited.

Silence. The guard was gone.

"Hello?" In the palpable quiet, his voice became the rusty creak of a door hinge. He cleared his throat and tried harder. "Hello?"

Kangdi had been seated in the corner of the cramped quarters, staring up at the last streaks of the crimson-hued clouds above, when the voice reached her ears.

"Erm…" She rose hesitantly, heading towards the front of her cell in a halting stumble.

_What am I doing?_

The rebel could only hope that she sounded more confident than she felt. As her Firebending started to return to her, she could sense the inner fire building up on the coiled side of her core, and then exploding into her nerves and limbs in painfully haphazard jolts. Terrible, really…_ow!_

There went another nerve, and her right elbow gave a spasmodic twitch. Truly, Kangdi would have found the sight so much more comical had it not been for the lingering sensation, as if a red-hot branding iron were running along the insides of her capillaries. Straightening up, she ignored the pain and called out in the most commanding tone that she could possibly muster.

"Hello? Who's there?"

No response.

"Eh?"

On the other side of the corridor, Iroh had also arrived at his cell door. He grasped the metal bars and peered out. It was then that he received what could be called a welcome surprise.

A dark head protruded from between the bars of the cage directly opposite him. Odd features at first, but as it turned towards him, the figure was decidedly feminine, despite the messy hair and dark red prison garb. A pair of dark amber eyes locked onto his gaze.

"You're not new here, are you?"

It took him a while to realize that she had spoken, but Iroh regained his composure quickly enough. He chuckled calmly. "No, but I wish I was."

The retired general was rewarded with a grin. "That I understand. My name's Kangdi. I got locked in here for trying to blast some Dai Li into the next life and give Azula-teme some trouble. How about you? What's your name?"

_Interesting child_… "I was caught on Fire Nation grounds after being exiled."

Kangdi gave him a straightforward questioning look. "That doesn't sound like very much. Still, if they locked you up in here, you must be pretty important. Friends?" She was cut off sharply, and the head receded, accompanied by a loud "Itai!" as a jolt of pain and bending energy flooded the rebel's core.

Concerned hazel eyes gazed at the other cell door. "Friends – but are you all right?"

"Yeah. That pink girl hit me really hard and took out my movement. The last of my Firebending just came back."

Inwardly, Iroh winced at the statement; he remembered full well the discomfort of bending abilities returning after Ty Lee had disabled him. "Oh. That must have hurt."

"_You think_?" Edges of sarcasm tinged the teen's deadpan; for a moment, the old general was reminded of his nephew, who had often used the same tone with him.

"Hey, you never told me your name." Kangdi was tapping a finger to her chin thoughtfully and directing a stare at him.

He grinned.

"Iroh."

A moment of silence.

Then, an audible _clang_ reigned supreme as the girl's hands seized the bars, staring so hard that the general feared her eyes might fall out. "_Iroh_? As in the _General Iroh_? As in the _Dragon of the West_?" She gaped. "Wow…forget what I said earlier about you just being important. How many chapters do you _have_ in the _history books_?" The right eye twitched in astonishment.

Truly, an interesting reaction. Iroh's hearty chuckle filled the corridor. "Retired general," he corrected out of pure habit, "I haven't counted yet, but the schoolteachers may be censoring those chapters anytime now." He pondered. "You come from the Fire Nation, yes?"

Kangdi finished gathering her meager composure. "Yeah. I was born in the northeast of the Fire Nation, but we moved to Rei soon afterwards. Southern half, sleepy little town that few outsiders entered. Fewer left." Accompanying the words came a small half-smile. "I don't suppose you've heard of it? They got…disbanded almost two years ago."

Iroh gazed solemnly at her. "I am sorry to say that I have never heard of it, Miss Kangdi, but I wish that I could have prevented it. As the brother of the Fire Lord and as a general in the army, it should have been my duty to keep up with our nation's military actions."

The rebel shook her head. "No, it wasn't your fault; it happened after the, ah, exile news. Couldn't have been avoided anyway. They were looking for traitors who they thought had been harboring Earth Kingdom fugitives."

A kind of grim finality settled over the two, as footsteps sounded and the guard passed by. "Oy!"

"What?" Kangdi glared at his face.

"No talking, prisoner. You hear me? You heard me, right? Good. Excellent, excellent. Now – "

"ZIP IT!"

Her Firebending was back, but she didn't need it. The rebel lunged at her jailor, snarling furiously and slavering at the mouth like a rabid dog, her voice rising as she bit off the end of each word. "Here's a suggestion for you: get lost to the ends of the SPIRIT WORLD!"

The guard's reaction was appropriate to his situation. He balked at the sight of a young prisoner inexplicably going mad – a female one at that – and stumbled back from the bars with a very un-masculine yelp as her fist thrust through at him. "A-are you crazy?" Without waiting for his answer, the thug took off down the hall at a brisk walk. "You're not getting any food for the next week!" Out of sight, footsteps doubled time as the prisoners heard him take off running.

Kangdi brushed foam away with the back of her hand, staring after him. "Ehhhhh…" She turned to Iroh. "Remind me who appointed that guard here, please. He needs someone more competent as a replacement!"

A giggle escaped from the hold two cells down, accompanied by another girl's head popping out of the bars. Kangdi turned to assess this new arrival. "Hi, Kangdi, but I guess you already know me by now." Her eyes gave the other girl a quick once-over.

Auburn hair glinted dully in the dim light, blue eyes bordering on dark steel gray. "Pleased to meet you, Kangdi." The sleeveless red smock of a Fire Nation first-class prisoner was draped over tattered green Earth Kingdom regalia, brown armguards each bearing a gold badge with the kanji for "capitol" inscribed in block lettering.

"My name is Suki."

* * *

Zuko definitely had a headache. 

It pounded and pounded on the delicate lines of his skull, it crackled and it charred and it blazed away merrily, scorching the lining of the brain and causing him to toss and turn in the middle of the bed.

Until he sat bolt upright, looking wildly about and realizing (to his consternation) that the bed was on fire. What an idiot he was. He must have been Firebending in his sleep again. Snorting in disgust at his own stupidity, Zuko leapt out from underneath the flaming red covers, beating and stomping at the furniture until the sheets only smoldered and smoked.

The scarred teen sat down on the hard metal floors of his royal bedroom, drawing his knees up to his chest and burying his face in his arms. Long silk robe settling about his figure, Zuko allowed himself indulgence in one long, troubled puff of smoke that issued from between clenched teeth and curled up about his frame, before raising his head again to look about himself.

He was home, all right. Home. Where was home, again? Zuko found himself wondering at the abrupt turn his life had taken. He was back in the palace, he was back where he had grown up and where his true family lived, and his three-year hunt for the Avatar was over. Yet something niggled insistently inside his chest and told him that his true quest was still not over. Why was this happening to him? He should have felt happy to be back after so many years of banishment. His father loved him. Azula agreed with him for once. Mai was more than willing to be his girlfriend, and he had no problem with that. His nation, his people, had accepted him back. He had everything that he'd ever wanted. He had his honor, his country, his throne. He had it all back. Didn't he? Instead, Zuko felt more miserable than ever.

But he didn't understand. The teen's spine slouched in a deep sulk; lifting his head and staring about himself, he took in the sight of the cold metal and rich red carpet in his bedroom. _The royal architects need to get more wood in here_. But then, wood burned. It was a flammable item, something that could easily be reduced to ashes. Reduced, gone, just like he wanted all of these memories and troubles. His childhood bound him here out of a sense of duty and familiarity, the same familiarity of the room that he sat in. Yet now, the scene before Zuko's eyes was cold and alienating, the red of the carpet becoming the red of all the bloodshed, inside and out, that he had seen in his travels. Azula wouldn't understand. She had never experienced any pain before; she was always too busy doling it out to others. Neither would his father, who would merely cast aside Zuko's concerns as a sign of weakness. "A good ruler," Ozai's voice floated up from the prince's subconscious, "a good ruler is strong and powerful. The Fire Lord holds the most power in his nation, and when this war is over, the Fire Lord will hold the power in the world. The Fire Lord must provide an excellent, rigorous example for his people. He must never falter or take back his decisions. He must be swift, decisive, ruthless and merciless to all those who oppose him. _A good ruler rules with fear, and thus commands the loyalty of his people, for it is only out of fear of punishment that subjects will obey their ruler_. Remember this."

Was Zuko feared? No. If anything, he was probably detested by his people because of his scar, he reflected sullenly. The Fire Prince rested his chin on his knees. What was he supposed to do? What was going on? What was happening to him? He was sure he'd made the right choice by coming back, but memories began to flood his mind and confuse him even more. "_Is it your own destiny? Or is a destiny someone else has tried to force upon you_?" Thoroughly drained of energy, his head dropped further into his arms, and letting out a groan of frustration, Zuko rolled over and slumbered on the cold floor.

**

* * *

Author's Note:** I'm extremely late getting this up. PSATs and schoolwork have been draining my mind, so I took time over Christmas break to whip up the best possible chapter that I could get. For everyone who's reading this, here's your Christmas present! Some Iroh/Kangdi/Suki interaction, and next chapter, we see more of Zuko's past and what made him this way! 

I'd also like to thank everyone who's reviewed so far (only 2, actually) and give a big shout-out to The-Jaron. His questions and advice really inspired a lot of this chapter when I couldn't think of anything to write about; I was seriously considering putting this story on permanent hiatus when he reviewed it.

As always, I hope that you will read and review this chapter! I'd like to hear your thoughts about it: what you liked, didn't like, thought should change, were/weren't expecting, etc. Expect a bit of morbidity to crop up in the next chapter. As a friend of mine says: "Celebrate every death because it's great for population control." Happy Holidays, everyone!

P.S. The quote in the beginning of this chapter is actually something I wrote, because I couldn't found a song that fit.


	5. Reflections

**Disclaimer:** Cannot find my rights to _Avatar_ anywhere. Therefore, it is property of Nickelodeon, a subsidiary of Viacom, and the creation of the amazing minds of Michael Dante DiMartino and Bryan Konietzko. I only own Kangdi and references to her.

**Author's Note:** This is an entirely Zuko-centric chapter, dedicated to all of you Zuko fans out there, and a New Year's gift. I only have time to write chapters so fast over breaks and long holiday weekends; otherwise, I don't have the time to sit down and focus in on a chapter idea. And that, my readers, is where you come in. I write to hear your comments. What did you like, what made you laugh, what do you think could be improved and what would you like to see in the next chapter? Just a "well done, update soon" is fine! All you need to do is click that little purple button labeled "Go" in the bottom left corner at the end of any chapter, then copy and paste to send a review!

As said before, anonymous reviews ARE enabled, and I even accept flames. So please, all I want for New Year's is a review from each of my respected readers out there!

**

* * *

Chapter 5: Reflection**

_The world shakes, as if it wants to stop us,_

_Taking everything away,_

_If this was a dream, we would have woken by now._

_And we haven't done anything yet, _

_But we'll keep going!_

_-- English translation of "After Dark," Asian Kung-fu Generation_

The little boy sprinted across the grounds as fast as his feet would allow, face glowing with laughter, arms waving. "Mom! Mom!" He tripped and scraped his knee a bit, but it didn't matter, because Mom would be there to comfort him, so he bounced right back up and kept on running. Whenever Mom was around, he always felt like he could do anything. At only six years old, the little boy was already reading and writing, a kind, cheery presence to those who knew him. Light brown eyes sparkled with delight, eyes that would soon turn dark gold with advancement in bending, and the boy flung himself into his mother's arms. "Mom, I missed you so much!"

"I was only gone for five minutes, Zuko," Princess Ursa gently chided her son. The young woman was finding it a challenge to take care of two children, even if she was royalty. How in Agni's name did her nurse handle it? "You know you'll have to start sharing with Azula soon."

"Yes, Mom," the prince-to-be sighed softly. Although he knew she would have to tend to his younger sister again, he was determined to enjoy these moments. And as Ursa sat down, Zuko plunked himself into her lap and leaned against her, relishing the comfort of just being with his mother.

He had turned six barely five months ago, yet he was already experiencing a budding sibling rivalry. Zuko versus Azula. Of course, for now they only fought over being able to spend enough time with Mom. Little did he know that a decade later, this rivalry would turn into a life-or-death game, the line distinctly drawn between Azula and Zuko, the hunter and the hunted. For now, he would enjoy every moment of being with his family. Even if Azula was a meanie to him, Zuko knew that Mom meant just as much to her as to himself, and he didn't want to fail. Because with Mom around, he was sure he could do anything. He would protect her, for she was the center of his and Azula's little universe. And because he was Azula's big brother, he had a duty to protect her, as well. And Mom would always be there for both of them.

Zuko was sure of it.

Light footsteps rang against the wooden floorboards of the palace walkway, and Azula appeared. She was only four, but it was clear that she would soon be a classic Fire Nation beauty, just like her mother. The girl also plunked down onto Ursa's lap, pushing Zuko aside.

Not startled in the least, Zuko resisted. All right, so maybe he didn't like Azula as much as he should have. But this was Mom's lap, he was here first, and he deserved to sit here just as much as she did! Couldn't she at least share and let him have half? Just because she was younger…

He shoved her back.

Azula, nestled up against Ursa, was not startled either by Zuko's reaction. He had far too much time with Mom. She wanted to spend time with Mom! The little girl raised both hands and jumped up. "Look, Mom, see what I can do!"

Bringing her palms close together, the four-year-old concentrated hard. Eyes only a shade or two darker than her brother's focused in between her hands, and she tried to pack all of the energy she could in there, with a mighty effort. _Come on, come on, show yourself!_

And a puff of smoke rose from the lower left palm before a small flame blossomed. It was barely comparable to the light from a standard candle, but nonetheless an impressive – and perhaps frightening – display to be had from a four-year-old. Stunned by her daughter's progress, Ursa froze for only a second before clapping at Azula's performance. "That's amazing, Azula!"

"Ursa, how old is she?"

That voice. The Fire Princess recognized it immediately, and rose in his presence, dusting off robes to make herself presentable and bowing her head briefly. "Azula is four years old, my prince."

"Hn." Prince Ozai let out a snort of some unnamed emotion, gazing at his daughter, who bowed respectfully in his presence. "Azula, come with me." The Fire Prince turned and strode regally away, muted red robes trailing a whisper against the polished mahogany floor.

Azula's grip on Ursa's arm tightened.

"Go on."

She looked up. Mom?

"If I'm not here when you come back, look for me in the western hallway," Ursa instructed her daughter. "Now, go with your father." She placed her hand over Azula's.

Azula let out a little sigh before releasing Mom's sleeve. The little girl turned and scampered to catch up with her dad, heels pattering quickly, topknot bobbing. She knew that Dad liked her, and she knew it was because she was special to him, she knew it was because she could already Firebend, much, much better than her brother Zuzu ever could. It was something that she lorded over him. But Mom loved her elder brother. Couldn't she, for once, just experience that? Dad was on her side, for sure, because she was a great Firebender. Could Mom ever give her unconditional love, like she did for Zuko?

The brother in question watched his little sister go. He was content for the moment, being with Mom, and snuggled right back into her lap the moment space was available. He loved her, and he loved his family, but he just couldn't understand why Dad seemed always to be paying attention to 'Zula and her Firebending. The Prince acknowledged that his younger sister was certainly talented in the art – how could he not, she flaunted it in his face almost every time they met – and was even jealous of her. With little to no practice, she was already producing fireballs in under a month, whereas it had taken him six to just get his hand to start steaming. _Those prodigies_.

Yet, as envious as he was of Azula, Zuko was still her protective elder brother, and he wouldn't let anything happen to her. They were all still family. Just him and Mom, Azula and Dad. One little universe, where everything was perfect and complete.

* * *

The seventeen-year-old shifted in his sleep, and rolled the other way, curling up into an even tighter ball on the floor. His scar faced up, the large burn-mark stretching unchecked across his left eye, cheek, and the ruins of what had once been a healthy left ear, before dying out in a flaming trail.

* * *

He'd never understood what they really meant. War? What was it? Some game that people played out there, on a field far, far away from the palace. But the finality of it was too great when his mother had spoken that day in the palace room: "Iroh…has lost his son. Your cousin Lu Ten did not survive the battle."

That had just struck too close to his universe. Lu Ten? Dead?

In his heart the eleven-year-old had truly begun to fear for his family. The promise that he had made so many years ago – to protect them forever and ever – seemed to send a chill down his spine. What if he failed? What would happen? He would be a liar, and his family would be split apart. Zuko was going to get stronger, and he was going to prevent that from ever happening.

* * *

Mom. 

She was gone.

How could this have happened?

Golden eyes opened slowly.

He had tried so hard to protect her. She had been the center of their little world, she had been the one to hold everyone together, a pacifist. She had soothed him when he cried, she had come in to reassure him there were no monsters under the bed when he woke up screaming from another nightmare, and she had tempered Azula the same way.

Fire Lady Ursa.

Loving, caring, a beautiful Fire Nation woman and the epitome of a mother. His Mom had completely dedicated herself to her family. Was this what happened to her in return? Why? Zuko had tried. He had already been getting stronger and stronger. He had been catching up to Azula. He had vowed in his heart that he would protect them all.

And he had failed.

Failed.

He had failed everyone. He had failed his family, his friends, and most importantly, himself. Zuko hadn't been able to protect his mom. He didn't know what the threat was, never mind where he measured up to against this threat. All he knew was his failure.

Could he ever face anyone again?

Zuko had woken up that morning, remembering a dream from last night where it seemed Mom had left. Had she? He raced down to find Azula playing with the pearl-handled dagger that she had stolen from his room. Getting a teasing "No one knows," from her, the stricken boy dashed outside to find his father standing at the turtleducks' pond.

Still as a statue. The birds weren't chirping, the turtleducks were apparently frozen in their places, and the silence weighed so heavily against the lack of a familiar presence. In this petrified tableau, the boy's choked voice could barely displace enough air to carry his words.

"Where's Mom?"

Silence.

It was then that Zuko realized what had happened.

He was a failure. He couldn't even protect Mom.

He had failed.

Slowly, an ache in his side manifested. It numbed his body, and everything started to go cold. Zuko could have laughed as the nothingness took over and began to work its way down his spine, finally anesthetizing him to the pain, even as the warm radiance of summer faded away into the background. The grasses withered and died around his dad. The turtleducks made a mad sprint for safety, only to burst into little balls of flame with feet and wings. Little oily, feathered firecrackers, like the ones Azula loved to throw at him. Dad?

His father was on fire. Zuko – or rather, detached Zuko – watched impassively. No feelings, no emotions. Was this how Azula felt? She appeared in the archway to the duckpond garden, leaning against the wooden frame with a sadistic sneer on her face, golden eyes sunken into dark pits, and Zuko could have sworn that he saw her blazing blue, just like Dad. The flames licked at her nine-year-old frame; from far away, a voice whispered into Zuko's ear. _So young, and she's already so cruel and arrogant. She cannot control her own fate anymore. She has let him shape her. And you?_

He glanced down at his body slumped there, and horror crept up, seizing his lungs, at what he saw. The same blue flames had been spreading out towards it, and now they were arrived, licking at his boots and gnawing merrily at the topknot. As his detached mind watched, Zuko's body began to shimmer, red flames struggling against blue as the insidious foreign heat now started to creep into his blood vessels. He could see how the blue flames were tainting his _qi_, and he observed, calmly, that they were not familiar and warm like most fire was, but in fact cold and invasive.

Cold heat. It rippled off of the both of them in unfeeling waves, merciless, ruthless. A shadowy figure grasped at Zuko, as if trying to protect him from the sickening radiation. Mom? For a moment, feeling seemed to return as warmth seeped into him, from the shadowy spirit. And then in the cold heat, the shadow dissolved and fled.

And Zuko understood that he was alone, alone with two whom he had once considered to be his family, and that no matter how hard he tried, nothing would help them anymore. The light dimmed until only two figures were left – the two eyeless, soulless beings consumed in their own blue hatred, and the third being slowly overtaken by the inertia of the strange fire, with utter silence reigning.

* * *

The Prince sat bolt upright, gasping for breath, sweat beading and rolling down his face. A tentative hand drew up to trace melted red scar tissue. Upon the meeting of fingers to flesh, both eyes closed in silent contemplation. 

The cold had been from sleeping on the metal floor. There were no blankets to keep him warm. _That's why I'm so cold_. Dismissing the thoughts from his head, Zuko unsteadily got to his feet; one step, two – then he fell on his knees in a slump, head ringing with exhaustion and confusion and a high-pitched whine sounding insistently in his ears. What had he been doing? And what was that dream for? So stupid. A mere dream. It had only been a dream. Dreams had no meaning. Right?

After a minute or so, he struggled wearily to pull himself to the bed using only his arms. Hauling himself up, Zuko collapsed on the pile of smooth silk sheets, trying to dismiss the dream and go to sleep. After all, it _was_ only a dream. It carried no real significance. He was home. He was in the palace. Was he really home? Yes, it was true.

_Now sleep. It's only a matter of time until morning comes, and then everything will be back to normal. Please, just let everything go back to normal. Please._

But for the rest of the night, Zuko did not sleep, distracted by nightmares of his old memories, distorting and charring to ashes. And when he finally dozed off in the light hours of dawn, he awoke with a startled cry, grasping frantically for a lifeline invisible to everyone but himself.

**Author's Note:** So, what did you think of it? This chapter was a little shorter than intended, since I finally decided to have it focus on Zuko only. Hope you enjoyed!

Please, read and review this story. Three reviews and over 300 hits isn't quite what I'd been hoping for, and I'd like to challenge you to raise that count!


	6. Cognition

**Disclaimer: **I own everything related to Avatar…just kidding! All I really do own are Kangdi and my random OCs in this story. Avatar belongs to Mike Dante DiMartino, Nickelodeon, and Viacom.

**Author's Note:** Happy reading!

**

* * *

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Chapter 6: Cognition

_Don't tell me how life is  
Cause I don't really want to know  
Don't tell me how this game ends  
Cause we'll just see how it goes_

– "_Going Down in Flames," 3 Doors Down_

It was the second week of imprisonment, and already she had found a new hobby.

Provoking the guard proved to be the most fitting pastime for Kangdi. Her discovery had been made the day after her arrival. Subtle yet entertaining. A few well-placed words, the occasional prod at his ignorance, setting a figuratively hot needle to an especially raw nerve, even the 'accidental' missed shots when she played games of tossing some pebbles at other pebbles, causing them to rebound (of these there were more than several. Sometimes the ground underneath the guard's feet also happened to spontaneously combust.) It was a fairly amusing recreation, and she happened to be excellent in her discretion. Hitting the guard continually would definitely earn her a couple of missed meals, however, allowing for the general randomness of her little vibes, she could easily attribute to the building's "terrible state of affairs, don't you think?" which she mentioned each time he interrogated her. "Perhaps you should ask Ozai to get his high-and-mighty engineers to repair this place." Eventually he stopped with the questions. Her ensuing attacks became even greater in number and, perhaps, even brattier in nature. But that was just the natural competitive spirit in her coming out, wasn't it? And the activity always became even more fun whenever Suki joined in with the insults.

But what she really wanted was not her own freedom from imprisonment itself, or simple entertainment. It was freedom from the war.

And the first step to that was breaking out of here.

* * *

Iroh was in a good mood. Who knew that his brother's dungeons were capable of maintaining such a high level of service? Although the rice gruel was usually stale and the steamed bread moldy, the maid who brought food to the prisoners would sometimes slip in a cup of jasmine tea or some other special hot drink, which Iroh enjoyed immensely. He was beginning to think that perhaps staying here for a while might not be such a bad idea. It was so sad to consider leaving this place, and there still remained the issue of sparing as many innocent people as possible.

Yet he did have a duty to fulfill, he mused. Zuko's apparent return to the Fire Nation royalty had thrown an unexpected wrench in his plans – the retired general could only hope that his nephew would snap out of it sooner or later, or in order to restore the balance, Iroh just might be forced to intentionally harm Zuko. His stomach turned at the thought. Zuko, the little boy whom Ursa had so cherished. Zuko, the one who had carried all of his hopes after Lu Ten died, even if Iroh could never forget his son. Would he really have to kill the beloved teenager? If the worst scenario case truly were to happen, then outright conflict would be the only option left.

He preferred not to think about it, and instead focused his thoughts towards hoping that somehow, _somehow_ Zuko might realize the truth behind the veil of deception that Ozai and Azula had presented him with. That poor boy.

* * *

The aforementioned Princess reclined arrogantly into the corner of her makeshift throne. Set up in her equally lavish bedroom, it had been enthusiastically gilded with magnificent ruby-red velvet and engraved with little gold designs by the royal furniture-makers at her command, as anyone who disobeyed the Princess Azula's orders tended to mysteriously vanish, along with all discernable connections to them, such as immediate family and friends. The only sign that betrayed the princess's cool guise was a lone, cat's-claw fingernail tapping restlessly against one fiery golden swirl of splendor.

To call it repetitive would have been perceived as an understatement. _Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap_. It rang loudly into the silence. _Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap_. Even Mai's nerves were getting a bit frazzled by the monologue of the nail on that particular left armrest. _Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap_. It just wouldn't stop – or couldn't it? So annoying. _Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap_.

Mai just waited patiently, years of practice kicking into play and allowing her to maintain a bored poker face as she endured the tapping. She was absolutely sure that Ty Lee would snap before she did. She was right.

"What's wrong, Azula? Zuko's back at home, you've captured two highly wanted traitors to the Fire Nation, and the Avatar's dead, but you still don't seem too happy. It's just that your aura's been so _gray_…" The pink-clad acrobat lowered her one-handed handstand onto both elbows and looked up at the Fire Princess, curiosity and concern plainly written all over her wide-eyed gaze.

_Yep. There she goes again…_

Abruptly, the tapping stopped. Without so much as a backwards glance, Azula's armor-clad figure swung its legs forward, rose from the elaborate chair, and strode edgily out of the baroque chamber. The sound of boot heels ringing metal flooring echoed down the empty hall.

"You had to say that, didn't you, Ty Lee," the missiles expert droned, twirling an evenly weighted throwing knife by the hole in the handle. "If Azula really wants to let us know what she's worried about, she'll tell us. Don't pry." Mai sighed in irritation and flipped the weapon off her right hand, absentmindedly catching it on the index finger of her left.

Out in the hallway, Azula's fists clenched. _That Avatar_. Her instincts were telling her that he was still alive. _How could he still be alive? I hit him with a lightning bolt. I saw him die. He should be dead!_ Yet, there was an air of suspicion surrounding the whole matter.

Perhaps her brother would know. _He should come in handy_. After all, he'd been chasing the Avatar for six months; he should at least be useful in gaining more information on the twelve-year-old. At this thought, Azula's fists trembled in rage. She refused to be publicly outsmarted by a mere twelve-year-old boy! Extricating her pride from this matter would only involve a bit of questioning, a couple of little white lies here and there, one or two dirty black ones, and she was free from public stigma. _Yes_, Azula grinned. Zuko would, indeed, come in _very_ handy.

* * *

The earthbender yawned widely, loudly, and stretched out in her makeshift earth tent, lacing fingers together and pushing her hands out so far in front of her tiny body that they emitted a series of loud pops and cracks of knuckles – _there we go_ – before slamming a weathered fist up into the air. The sides of her rock shelter burst apart along with a few dramatic billows of disintegrating dust. "Mornin' everyone! How's everything going." It was more a careless statement than a question, but it elicited a "Good, and you, Toph?" from her friend the waterbender.

Toph grinned and gave Katara a cheeky thumbs-up before turning to the warped heap still under its own pile of blankets. "Hey, Snoozles, wakey wakey." One hand bent a series of pebbles to bounce on the sleeping Water Tribe warrior's nose.

Her victim shot up, fast, yelling a strangled war cry, eyes wide open, one eyebrow twitching, and drew his black sword as he readied a stance that was supposed to appear imposing but really just looked ridiculous. "Glad to see you're still alive."

Katara rolled her eyes. "Of course he's alive, Toph; Sokka'll never die as long as there's food around." This statement of opinion earned her a snicker from Aang, with the flying lemur soaring over to investigate as well.

A grumble issued from the surly dark-skinned teen.

* * *

Voices echoed down the prison corridor. "So what're you in here for? Sabotaging supply lines, blowing up a base, something like that? Azula doesn't take kindly to those she keeps prisoner."

The other teenager grinned. "She actually invited me to join her once."

Suki sat up. "You're kidding."

"No way! Of course, she really just thought I'd be less of a nuisance if I worked for instead of against her – but I found _that_ out _after_ I'd rejected her offer."

"Some Princess she is."

"Pretty self-serving, huh."

"Stuck-up and arrogant, too."

"Arrogant Firebender …now where have I heard that one before?" Kangdi eyed her companion amusedly. Suki giggled.

"My first time seeing real Firebenders was when a bunch invaded my home island looking for the Avatar," the Earth Kingdom fan warrior offered. "When we were kids, we played a game called Protection, where Firebenders were always the bad guys: we never felt sorry when they died. We were always taught that one should never trust a Firebender, that they were just machines of destruction with over-inflated egos. I used to believe that" – here Kangdi ducked her head to stifle a snort of laughter – "but then again, I also used to think that the Avatar had been dead for a century. He was just frozen in a chunk of ice!"

"Eh heh heh…I apologize for my nephew's rash actions." Iroh's voice made itself hear. "Prince Zuko still has a lot to learn. He was only upset about his situation, and expressed that in a very unhealthy manner."

"Wait." Suki stuck her head out from between the bars of her cell, voice rising in disbelief. "That guy who attacked us was your – your _nephew_?"

"Keep yourself a bit more up to date, my friend," Kangdi's voice advised languidly. The dark-eyed Firebender leaned back against the cold stone wall of _her_ cell, cushioning head on arms. "It could be a useful experience." The usual twin furrows in her brow twitched in amusement.

"Hey…" Suki drifted off, hinting at indignation. "I keep myself 'up to date' perfectly fine! Who are you to be telling me about that?"

"An arrogant Firebender."

Silence.

Kangdi snickered. "What, no sense of humor?"

Iroh guffawed.

Suki threw back her head and laughed.

The younger Firebender just sighed and closed her eyes. This – this feeling of friendship and of family – this was what she had been missing for the past two years. A little smile tucked itself into the corner of her mouth.

* * *

To call him frustrated would have been an unusual choice of words. The prince kicked bad-temperedly at a pebble lying in the walk, sending it flying towards the turtle-duck pond as he shuffled down to the royal antechamber, clenched fists swinging at his sides and looking for all the world like some incensed teenage delinquent instead of a member of the cultured Fire Nation royalty.

His father had called a meeting and specially requested his son's attendance. Somehow, though, Zuko knew that it was trap, a test of his true loyalties. He might have been a tactless idiot among the Earth Kingdom barbarians, but the prince had been brought up among Fire Nation politicians, where underhanded tricks and two-faced deception were the order of the day. Zuko leveled a glare at the offended turtle-duck, which suddenly adopted a guilty look and retreated into the safety of its shell. Even this little creature could sense that the supremely put out Prince was not to be trifled with.

The hallway was silent. Generations of Fire Lords glaring down from their larger-than-life portraits: they seemed to all be staring at him. Feeling very small, Zuko glanced down at his feet and shambled over to the painting of his father…_wait_…_shamble_? Almost unconsciously, the prince corrected himself, his walk slowing into a deliberate stride, back straightening regally, head held up and chest out. It would be unseemly for a servant to catch him off-guard and _shambling_. _My time in the Earth Kingdom must really be getting to me_, he mused woefully as he studied the large portrait. Large swirls of black calligrapher's ink adorned the artwork, lending his father's likeness a sense of unsurpassable grandeur and foreboding darkness.

_And me_? What would he be when became the Fire Lord, following in Dad's footsteps? Would he ever measure up? No, could he? The side that he'd showed the meeting was the son Ozai always wanted. Zuko had nodded at every word that his father put forth; he'd argued diplomatically yet stubbornly for his father's opinions and he'd acted the perfect Prince. Yet inside, he knew that he disagreed with almost everything that the generals had suggested. And this was the most confounding part of all. _What kind of a Fire Lord, or even Prince for that matter, agrees with everything that everyone else says? Azula was right. I'm a terrible liar. They'll find out soon enough._ He sighed, wearily, fighting the urge to press fingers to the scar. The façade would not last for very long. Zuko was sure of it.

* * *

Kangdi muttered and rolled over in her sleep, hands clasping her head.

"_The forty-first division was attacked before they could get to their stations. Ten people survived. Yinshen… he was… not one of them."_

"_No," she had whispered. _

"_I'm sorry," was all the correspondent could say, although the eleven-year-old couldn't hear him anymore. "He died with honor!" He perked up a bit, trying to comfort the young girl, but she had turned and was shuffling back to the hut. Past her father, who just stood there with a blank look on his face, like he wasn't sure if he had heard correctly. Past her mother, sunk to her knees, with her head bowed and sobbing uncontrollably, hunched over Five Lands as if trying to shield him from some avenging spirit. The four-year-old appeared confused at first. Then, touched by his mother's tears, he started crying in harmony as he patted her on the back. Into the small house Kangdi stumbled. There was nothing more to say. _

_The day before he left, Kangdi recalled miserably, she had yelled at him. "I won't forgive you for this! I won't forgive you if you leave; Yinshen, I hate you!" Furious at herself for not being able to fight in place of her elder brother, she had taken her anger out on him instead. "I can fight! I can go to the frontlines and you can stay here! Mom and Dad, Wudi, they all need you! I'm useless here! Why won't you let me go? You'll die out there! I'm the Firebender, not you, so I stand a better chance of coming back! WHY?"_

_And he had died, just like she had known he would. Dead. He was gone. Just like that, his life and memory and breath all numbed by the enemy. _

_The same enemy that _she_ should have fought, that _she _should have opposed in his place. She had failed to protect her loved ones when it was most necessary. _

Kangdi turned over on the makeshift straw futon, dragging her folded cloth pillow over her eyes. Soundless words murmured. And although the cell was filled with snores from the other prisoners, she did not – and could not – wake up.

**

* * *

**

Author's Note:

I wrote this in celebration of a friend and fellow Avatar fan who just celebrated their birthday recently. Here's to you; happy birthday!

Haven't updated in a very long time. Sorry! I even missed Chinese New Year! With piano season coming on, I might not write another chapter again until May: then, it'll be another obligation to someone's birthday. I hope to update during Spring Break, though, which starts soon for me. A whole nine days off from school! cheers

As always, please read and review! I'd like to hear your feedback on the chapter, so that I can write an even better (and hopefully longer) one next time!


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